Thursday, April 10, 2008

Ferocious


If you're here much, you've no doubt spied photos of Lola the dog. She's a big part of the family and the focus of much of Kate & Sarah's affections. She has horrible separation anxiety and often eats things we care about while laying on other things we care about subsequently destroying both, if we don't properly puppy proof before leaving her home alone. But we love her. She's a big mush and constant companion. She and I have walked, no doubt, hundreds of miles together in her lifetime.

Lola was conceived at the home of an abusive backyard breeder. Her mother was about a year and a half old and on her 3rd litter by the time she was brought to the rescue where Lola was born. When she came to the rescue, her mother didn't know how to play, had a scar on her forehead from being grazed by a bullet and was terrified of all men. The "breeder" bred all his boxers together indiscriminately, which resulted in some dogs that really don't look much like boxers. Lola is primarily white and her face is not smooshed in like that of the boxer archetype. Because she has short, white hair a lot of my neighbors think she's a pitbull. As we walk down the street together, Lola on her slack leash by my side, sniffing everything we pass, I am often asked "does your dog bite?" I've had people dramatically pull their children clear across the street as we approached together, people yell from down the street for me to hold off my dog, numerous children inquire as to whether she fights, and one guy yelled to us that if there were an Ugliest Dog competition, Lola will win hands down.

Today Lola and I were taking a walk at lunchtime. As we made our way home I passed a portly fellow sitting in his car. He had a giant, hot pink hair pick thrust into his do in a manner that called to mind the random debris that lodges shockingly into trees when tornadoes blow through. He appeared to be in his late 30s which made the hair pick look especially absurd. I expect that look from a 15-year-old. As we passed by Lola was heeling impressively. She usually does at the end of a walk when she's wearing down. He gave Lola a look and I steeled myself. Then he said "Is your dog ferocious?"

I said "no" out loud but in my head I completely lost it. "Not as ferocious as that hair pick that attacked you" I snapped back, mentally. I allowed my brain to indulge in the image of me ripping that hot pink bit of pointy plastic out of his head and beating him with it. Truth be told, I'm a lot more violent than my dog. I'm so sick of those idiots.

11 comments:

Aunt So-So said...

Remember when Lola ate my disposable camera at the Daniel Ave house? I was a so ticked at the time, but I can laugh about it now.

Sister K said...

aw, how cute are lola's pix that you post? how could anyone think she was a pitbull?!? i would've prob. sent u money (that i don't have) if you had actually said that pink pick comment to mr. dopo!

Keith said...

It's all love and hugs with that dog until you try to eat out of her food bowl. Oh, and she despises new furniture, especially arms of chairs. It's encouraging that the guy opened up his vocabucloset and put on "ferocious". All the pink-pickers around here would wear "mean" every time.

Anonymous said...

i think it takes the "vocabucloset" thing to far wehn you say theyd "wear" mean i mean we get it ok.

jdrueke said...

I have no idea what the above commenter is talking about. I just wanted to point out that person that they typed "to" rather than "too." They also missed the apostrophe in they’d. And what the heck does "vocabucloset" mean?

Anonymous said...

kepe out of this is btween me and fakey fake imposture so called keith rite avb the dog on yor hed whos prose blose.

Aunt So-So said...

If you're taking off points for typos, then "wehn" is also misspelled. To be honest, I'm not sure I follow the sentence, as it is so poorly formed.

LMP said...

"Anonymous", `eh? Time to come out of the vocabucloset.

Anonymous said...

hatters.

Aunt So-So said...

Dont hat the playas hat the game.

Anonymous said...

i ehat my mom