Feel-Good Banking

I needed a break from my desk so I took the harrowing walk down Roswell Road to the shopping center that houses the Kroger that houses the Starbucks to get myself a little caffeinated treat. Upon my arrival I realized I hadn't withdrawn my weekly $20 allotment of mad money (Dave Ramsey recommends naming this line item on your budget "Blow Money". Dave Ramsey obviously has a much larger budget than I. I cannot afford blow.)

So I sidled up to the ATM which is also housed in the Kroger at "Best Bank". Every time I see the sign for this bank (it's directly next to the mini-Starbucks) I think it's missing the "!". I dipped my debit card in and the soothing voice of a Londoner greeted me in the same soothing tone as that of my college art history professor, who never once failed to lull me to sleep. "Welcome...please enter your secret number." My 'secret number'? That's WAY better than a PIN. It's my secret number! I looked nervously about to be sure no one was watching and then, hunched slightly over the calming green screen, entered my secret number. "Thank-you, please wait a moment while your transaction is processing". 'Processing' with a long "O", of course. My transaction was prooocessing. I took a pleasant, deep breath while my transaction prooocessed.

Up popped the screen that beckoned to me to direct the machine. What would I like to do? Balance Inquiry? No. "Receive Cash"? Why yes, I'd LOVE to receive cash. Before I could continue, though, Best Bank (!) wanted to let me know they'd be taking a couple bucks from my account. I was so relaxed and happy to be at Best Bank (!) that I didn't mind one bit if they received cash, too. "Thank-you, have a nice day!" bid the British lady as I walked off to help Starbucks receive some cash, too.

Dodging speeding cars on the way back to the office I couldn't shake the feeling that I had just allowed myself to be fleeced...it just took awhile for the knowledge of it to prooocess.